| Chance of good conversation |  |
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Oh Yes |
| Chance of an argument | |
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Just turn round |
| Chance of a fight | |
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Well it is the zoo |
| Price of drink (3 average) | |
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Cheaper than the average |
| Friendly staff (3 average) | |
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Talk to anybody |
| Decor | |
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Recently Refurbished |
| Smell of toilets (1 minging) | |
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Recently Refurbished |
| Chance of pulling - under 30 | |
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Strumpet might pass through |
| Chance of pulling - over 30 | |
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Buy her a pint! |
| Like it if over 30 | |
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1 Hell - 5 Heaven |
| Like it if under 30 | |
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1 Hell - 5 Heaven |
| like the music if over 30 | |
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1 Hell - 5 Heaven |
| like the music if under 30 | |
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1 Hell - 5 Heavenl |
| Get a game of cards going | |
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1 Coppers - 5 £50's |
| Meet a space cadet? | |
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1 level - 5 Outer Space |
| Characters | |
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One or two! | Grief because of this entry | |
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Oh loads! |
| Have I Ever Been Barred |  |
No |
| Beer Garden | |
No |
| Pool Table | |
No |
| Dartboard |  |
Team in Local League |
| Lunchtime Meals | |
No |
| Evening Meals | |
No (Well there is the takeaway!) |
| Regular Entertainment | |
Occasional singers etc |
| Live Entertainment | |
Just the customers! |
| Bouncers on the door | |
Customers will do it! |
| Own Parking | |
No |
| Street Parking | |
Plenty outside |
| Car park Near | |
No Need |
| Easy Access for Wheelchair | |
Could get one in in a pinch |
| Suitable for children | |
Hell No |
| Play area | |
Only if you count the cellar |
| Music from | TV |
| Choice of Music | CD (god help us one and all) |
| Distance to Takeaways | One on premises! |
| Distance to other takeaways | Within staggering distance |
| Distance to Bookies | Closer than you can throw away £50 |